I don’t care about being disabled. I don’t care about a magic cure. It’d be convenient to be able to walk and climb and jump and use the bathroom and take a shower just like everyone else, but I’m okay with never knowing how. Most people I tell this to don’t understand why I say this, but it’s a popular sentiment among many people with disabilities.
So Much Work
Most of us, if there were a cure tomorrow for all disabilities, would spend more time figuring out how to balance, bear weight, walk, dress, tie shoes, jump, stretch, run, drive, cook – any the activities we’ve never done before or do in a different, adaptive way than continuing the way we’ve done it most of our lives. This is different among people with spinal cord injuries, and that’s very understandable. I wish for those people to gain as much function back as they’re able to tolerate.
Disabled Just Is…
But I don’t wish or care to be cured. Most of these skills are learned at a fast pace during childhood development. They’re much harder to learn when you’re an adult. You have to reverse everything you know how to do and do it differently… That isn’t to say disability is a GOOD thing. It’s just a thing. I am disabled. It’s not a dirty word. I’m not lesser than anyone. I don’t wish disability on anyone, but I also don’t think that babies should be terminated based on disability. That thinking that disability is bad needs to end so we CAN receive better health outcomes for people with disabilities that make up a quarter of our population.
I don’t care about being cured because I am a Christian and I do believe I was made to be exactly who I’m meant to be because if I didn’t believe that, I’d be admitting that God makes mistakes when I don’t believe that’s true. Humans aren’t perfect and that means our bodies aren’t either. So, I’m not mad at my disability (most days – we all have frustrating days disabled or not).
Problems Are All Different
The reason I brought up I don’t care about being disabled is that the most annoying trend I’ve seen on social media posts of people who are disabled are people saying “my problems are so small”. No Janice, my problems are the same as yours. I don’t know all your problems and some of them are probably bigger than mine. You’re only saying that because you can’t imagine life without being able to walk. Saying that disability is a big problem is prejudice. It’s a part of societal thoughts that need to change for everyone to be treated the same.
If you think my life is less than yours, then you have a problem. I don’t have a problem. I’ll keep living my own life. It says more about you than me when I’m just trying to live my life and you have to stop me to say how your problems are nothing compared to mine. Does the acknowledgement make you feel better? Because it doesn’t make me feel better. It’s belittling behavior. I was born the way I was supposed to be born and I’m alive the way I’m supposed to be alive. I just live.
Some days are hard, but some days are hard for everyone. Just because someone has DIFFERENT problems, don’t mean they’re greater than your problems. Everyone is different. Everyone needs help sometimes. Anyone, at any time, can become disabled and it’s how you respond to it that affects how people react to you, how you recover, how it changes your life or doesn’t. Becoming disabled does change your life, but it’s not always a bad thing. It’s just different. We’re all just different.